Thursday, May 24, 2007

We support our troops because...

I had an angiogram yesterday so I could not comment on The Des Moines Register neocon columnist John Carlson's latest effort, or lack thereof. Really, Carlson literally phone-in this piece since all he did was quote in toto an e-mail from one Warrant Officer Jim Funk of Ames, IA serving in Iraq with the Iowa National Guard.

Funk is a helicopter pilot, so he's one of those death ex machina guys who very rarely ever soils his hands as he deals out destruction and mayhem on those below. So without further ado let's sample and examine WO Funk's missive as related by Carlson:
"Hello media, do you know you indirectly kill American soldiers every day? You inspire and report the enemy's objective every day. You are the enemy's greatest weapon.
First WO Funk plays the typical reactionary opening gambit of blaming the media. It's not the president's fault that American soldiers are getting killed in Iraq, it's the media's. That's logical.

WO Funk follows with testosterone laced chest thumping:
The enemy cannot beat us on the battlefield so all he does is try to wreak enough havoc and have you report it every day. With you and the enemy using each other, you continually break the will of the American public and American government.

"We go out daily and bust and kill the enemy, uncover and destroy huge weapons caches and continue to establish infrastructure. So daily we put a whoopin on the enemy, but all the enemy has to do is turn on the TV and get re-inspired. He gets to see his daily roadside bomb, truck bomb, suicide bomber or mortar attack. He doesn't see any accomplishments of the U.S. military (FOX, you're not exempt, you suck also).
Care to read more of this example of machismo gone mad letter? Oh, let's do. This is like watching a bad horror flick.

Funk continues:
A couple of days ago we conducted an air assault. We lifted troops into an area for an operation. The operation went well and our ground troops killed (insurgents){why do you suppose the word "insurgents" is surrounded by parenthesis marks?} and took several prisoners, freed a few hostages and uncovered a weapons cache containing munitions and chemicals that were going to be used in improvised bombs.
Ah, yes, here WO Funk describes the good works our fighting forces do in Iraq. Nothing like whacking a few hajis, eh, WO Funk?

The good warrant officer continues his bellicose rant in a similar vein and concludes:
"Media, we know you hate the George Bush administration, but report both sides, not just your one-sided agenda. You have got to realize how you are continually motivating every extremist, jihadist and terrorist to continue their resolve to kill American soldiers."
What a mature observation. The media is all to blame. God forbid that the mere prescence of your august self, WO Funk, and that of your comerades has anything to do with the Iraqis' ire. If it weren't for the meddling of the "liberal" media Richard Perle's prediction that the Iraqis would greet their American liberators with flowers and chocolates would become true. Embedding those pliant journalist in the initial invasion was a mistake, WO Funk. Hell, the "media" should just get the hell out of Iraq and re-run clips from old John Wayne movies and tell us it's actually footage from the front, shouldn't it WO Funk!

The good warrant officer's attitude and that of 29% of Americans who share it, many of whom will never come close to wearing a BDU, plus the timidity of Congressional Democrats means the United States will never get out of Iraq until either one of two things occurs: A complete and total defeat in detail of a major unit of America forces in Iraq, as the German army at Stalingrad, or a unit wide mutiny by disaffected American troops. I'm not holding my breath that either of these ever occurs.

Face it folks, we're stuck. We're stuck in Mesopotamian muck for a very long time.

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