Reagan, the god

If this were 2007 B.C. instead of 2007 A.D., this stupid motherfucker would be a god. Oh, what am I saying, this stupid motherfucker already is a god! The only thing missing are the temples and priests, there are already plenty of worshippers.

By many measures, Reagan's administration was a disaster. A disasterous foreign policy in Central America, the repercussions of which we feel today in the form of undocumented immigrants. A disaster for working America, as "the Gipper's" administation signaled the beginning of twenty-seven years, and counting, of unremitting union busting, global outscourcing and stagnation in hourly wages and benefits.

Oh, but he is a hero. He ended the Cold War. Ha, ha! Against a Soviet Union tottering on the brink of economic collapse to begin with! America's baddest of badass presidents picked a fight with a tottering, old geezer, with a walker, and won! And he secured the Free World's supply of nutmeg. What a fuckin' man!!

Which brings me to the reason for the above tirade. As you many, or many not, already know the Republican presidental hopefuls held their first circle-jerk of the '08 campaign season at the Reagan Library. Needless to say it was a veritable love-fest, the inept, inane and under-qualified field of ten "...invoked the name of Ronald Reagan 19 times[.]" However, this wasn't good enough for some conservatives. Especially fulltime GOP fund-raiser Richard Viguerie.

E-mails the Manassas, VA direct-mail king:

“The three leading Republican presidential candidates continue to fail ‘the Reagan test,’” says Richard A. Viguerie, author of Conservatives Betrayed: How George W. Bush and Other Big Government Republicans Hijacked the Conservative Cause, referring to the debate aired over MSNBC. “The only thing genuinely Reaganesque about the performances of Rudy Giuliani, John McCain, and Mitt Romney was their physical location at the Presidential Library.”

“We won’t have conservative policies with any of the three leading candidates, and most of the others, so I continue to urge conservatives to withhold their support,” Viguerie said.

Viguerie’s Full Statement:

“For the past ten years Giuliani, McCain, and Romney—as well as most of the other presidential wannabees—have given conservatives no leadership against the Big Government policies of the Republican Congress and President Bush. Well, it’s too late. We’re now at the pandering stage of the campaign—pandering for conservative support—and if they wouldn’t speak out before, how can we believe them now?


They Fail “The Goldwater Test”

“Senator Barry Goldwater became the first political spokesman for the conservative movement because out of all the Republican politicians who claimed to be conservative, he and he alone was willing to confront the sitting Big Government Republican in the White House. President Eisenhower’s policies were ‘a dime store New Deal,’ he said on the floor of the Senate. He spoke truth to power.

“Well, again we have a Big Government Republican in the White House, and now it’s no longer a dime store New Deal—it’s a supersized Wal-Mart of a New Deal. The Republican welfare state is far worse than anything the Democrats achieved. To Giuliani, McCain, and Romney I say, ‘I knew Barry Goldwater, and you’re no Goldwater.’

They Fail “The Reagan Test”

“Throughout the 1960s and ’70s Ronald Reagan walked with us. He was there at our conservative functions, and not just at the head table—he mingled with us, listened to our concerns, and made it clear where he stood. Also, our friends were all around him as he governed in California and then ran for president—people like Dick Allen, Ed Meese, Lyn Nofziger, Marty Anderson, Judge William Clark, etc., etc.

“Where are the long-time conservative activists today around Giuliani, McCain, or Romney? I’m not talking about ‘campaign consultants’ who sell themselves to the highest bidder at campaign auctions. I mean dedicated and recognized conservative thinkers and activists who will work only for truly conservative candidates.

“If conservatives were not part of the Giuliani, McCain, and Romney inner circles before they ran for the presidency, we cannot expect them to have conservatives advising them if they get elected. And in politics, personnel is policy.

“P.S. Leave it to the Stupid Party to have Chris Matthews, a liberal Democrat, moderate a debate to select the Republican nominee for president!”

Jesus christ, how far right does this asshole want to go? Attila The Hun! Will you be satisfied, Dick, when little old ladies and little kids are begging on the streets for food? Will you be satisfied when the only programs funded in the federal budget is the military? And Chris Matthews "a liberal Democrat"?!

Look, Dick, I have a way so you can get out of your dilemma. Why don't we exhume Reagan's moldy corpse, get the Disney Studios to re-animate him and you and Grover Norquist can pull Ronnie's strings to your heart's content. And there would be plenty of the braindead who'd vote for Ronnie again, even if he were a zombie.